Wednesday, July 28, 2004

JPB Tea Party

As most women know, there is the occasional time a "Tea Party" is needed.  There is nothing virtuous or redeeming about the tea party, but it is necessary to prevent unneeded arguments with the DH and other punishment type events for the loved ones around you.

This evening I was happily rewarded, after 19 months of "mommy prison", with the opportunity to pick up my sister at the airport with her friend and have dinner at a restaurant without the DH or DC (dear child).  This would be my first actual outing that didn't involve grocery shopping or some other mundane errand that took place only after the DC was put to bed for the evening.  Unfortunately, the rain delayed the flight and made traffic horrific.  I thought, after speaking to my sister, the flight would only be delayed an hour and so I continued on to the airport and opted to sit, read, and enjoy the freedom, expecting her to land shortly.  After another hour I checked with the DH to see (via internet) if the flight was coming soon.  He informed me it was redirected and wouldn 't be in for another 2 hours.  He then added that I should had listened to him before and come home the first time he said instead of continuing on with my quest for freedom.

I cannot decide at this point if I am angry/upset about the disappointing evening or my DH utter lack of understanding for my needs and desires.   Perhaps I underestimated my desire to get out of the house and need for mental stimulation that didn't require simultaneously wrangling 3 dogs, picking up toys, listening to ESPN, and working on whatever project I had chosen for the evening.   I know I will get over it in the morning but tonight my feelings are hurt.  The DH did pick up on that much and tried to make up for it by half way cleaning the kitchen.  Somehow it falls short but will have to do.  When people talked about compromise in marriage I never thought it would be like this.  I have to compromise on my feelings and how I express them.  I have to hold my tongue because what I have to say/express is not worth the consequence that follows.  I have to control emotions I never knew should be controlled.

Once again, back to childhood, I was not taught to do such things.  Now I experience the consequences of my parents lack of discipline and guidance, AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!  Wow, this excuse is getting worn out.

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