The Middle Son

This last week he turned 6.

He was always on the chubby side.  Then he was just big.

He was born with a birth defect that we were told was a miracle.  A miracle that he had no lasting effects.  A less than 1% chance that he is now perfectly normal.

He likes to laugh.  He really really likes to make you laugh.

He is particular and passionate, equally.  When things are not in his particular order he passionately lets you know.

He still hates to give kisses.  He says he is allergic to girls, except me.

His imagination will wow and frustrate you all at the same time.

He would rather be funny than right.

He looks the most like his father.  He acts the most like his father.  He is shy and sensitive, easily hurt but unable to tell me why.  Just like his father.

I pray I do what God will have me do for him.  I am humbled by the gift that is my middle son.  Six years seem to have flown by while I was busy being a mom.

I would like to say I wish I could have cherished them more.  But it is their brevity that makes them precious to me.  How they are all squished between diaper changes, laughter, and laundry makes them more amazing.

Happy Birthday Alex!

Joy in Suffering

There has been much talk recently of trials and suffering.  As a world class complainer, I find the topic difficult to wrap my thoughts around.

Why can’t we just fix it?  Why does it have to be this way?  It must be my fault because this doesn’t happen to people who do it “right” or “better”.  I do not understand.

This morning I tried to explain 9/11 to my 8 year old son.  I couldn’t do it without tears.  The fear I felt that day came rushing back.  The memory of standing with co-workers watching the news in a large downtown area far away from home surrounded by strangers was overwhelming.  Trying to keep it together as I rode back with a gentlemen my father’s age across the deep south was difficult.  The man was born in Iran and fled decades ago because the same thing that happened that day in our country happened in his country to a much greater degree.  He understood what had happened.  He already knew what it all meant that day.

I am working on understanding and by working I mean praying.  I know seeing the joy in trials and rejoicing at my pain when the suffering is unbearable will not come from me.  It will not come from my heart.

It will be gift, a blessing.  To rejoice in God being glorified during tragedy, to embrace pain as a gift, as an opportunity is not in my nature.

10 years later many blessings can been seen.  The gifts shining against the backdrop of such pain makes them shine that much brighter.  Embracing my children that did not exist on that day and to count my blessings since then is overwhelming.

I pray I can look faithfully to God during trials, large and small.  I pray I can thank Him for His gifts even when I do not understand them.

Today I am thankful for brothers building memories.

I am thankful for father and son making memories.  Memories made not on my timeline but His.

Today I am thankful for brave men who run toward the sound of battle. 

I am thankful for the pain of that day and many since.  Those wonderful days have molded and changed me for good.  Not goodness from my own heart but goodness given to me by the only One who has any to give.

I pray it is the same for you.

WFMW–A kick in the pants

When I feel overwhelmed and whiny,

When my complaints out number my praises,

When I cannot face my daily chores and pout,

When my sinful flesh takes the lead, and my self-control takes a nap

He always sends me a story, a reminder, a kick in the pants

Something to make me feel small, petty, ungrateful

Something to make me feel loved, blessed, joyful

That I am His child, saved by Grace, through no work of my own

What Works For Me this week is this video.  Its timing was providential, as usual.

This was grace - short film from Andrew Laparra on Vimeo.

Linked up to Works For Me Wednesday over at We Are That Family

Also, linked up at Women Living Well

Thankful Thursday

Rejoice in the Lord always. Again I will say rejoice. Philipians 4:4

I am thankful for this Lady (on the right).  I am thankful for a God who answers a prayer spoken over 10 years ago.  I am thankful and in awe of finding her next door to a rent house we picked online with a 2 week notice to move. I am thankful for a new skill I can use to bless others even if they use it for car tracks. 

A skill that requires I spend large amounts of time with these two ladies (above) who understand my fabric addiction.  Ladies who understand that I have 6 projects going on and I still bought fabric for another (isn’t it lovely? Antique Fair from Moda).

Ladies who understand that there are days when my points will never match.  Days when I will lose my scissors even though they are tied to me.  Who love me enough to give me a quilting timeout to collect myself.

So, thank you ladies.  See you tomorrow.  I promise to have my blocks ready if not I will give you cheesecake to distract you.

Linked up today over at Thankful Thursday. Thanks for the idea Kathryn!

God Is In The Details

 

Recently my grandmother passed away, somewhat unexpectedly, and we needed to head home.  We were unprepared and couldn’t afford the trip.

My family insisted we come home and offered to pay for the tickets and provide us with a car to drive.  Even with such a generous gift there are still many small things that need to be purchased on a trip with 3 small boys and 3 dogs to leave behind.

We had to get there quickly because DH had to come home right after the funeral.  We planned as best we could, still missing a few key things like how to unlock the front door for the dog sitter and accurate feeding instructions.   We lost one night of sleep, finally got confirmed tickets at 4:30 am, and boarded our plane at 6 am.  Everything was working very well for such short notice.  We were even able to find tickets from the airport here to our destination with only one layover and no body scanners.  A miracle!  And at half the price!  Another miracle.

On the flight we bought some snacks for the kids because I did not pack any food and we were all without breakfast.  Not a good combo for a 3 hour flight.

Our layover was at DFW in Dallas where there was a USO.  This meant free food and a safe place with cartoons to sit with the boys.  Perfect.  As we were checking in  with the USO the flight attendant from our flight walked up to us to give us our money back.  She said that military gets free snacks on flights and thanked my husband for his service.

On our second flight we were on a prop jet which the boys loved.  The little ones fell asleep almost immediately and our oldest was content to watch iTunes on the laptop.

I don’t remember much about the second flight.  I had been awake now for 28 hours.   We got off the plane with our usual chaos, the boys eager to see Nana and their cousins. 

As they all ran ahead a gentleman who was on the plane with us walked up beside me. He handed me a folded piece of money and simply said “God told me to give this to you.”  I took it because I honestly didn’t know what else to do and asked him to repeat what he said.  He repeated himself and said “You know?”  I said I did know and thanked him.

He walked on and I didn’t see him again.  As I finally caught up with my family at baggage claim I told my husband what just happened.  I pulled out the bill and unfolded it to finally see he had given me a $100.  We were surprised and very thankful.

After we returned home I realized I had taken a picture of our mysterious friend.  I was playing with my camera settings during that flight and taking pictures of anything interesting near me.

So thank you friend whoever you may be.  We don’t often see the results of how God uses us but many times we are the recipients of that faithful obedience.

Thank you Lord for caring for the birds of the field and our trip home.  Nothing is too small or impossible for You.  I am grateful for the reminder.